The last week or so and been an interesting learning experience, more because of my awareness of what is occurring than what is actually occurring.
It may sound like I'm coming down with a bit of schizophrenia (is that like being a bit pregnant?), but fear not. I think it's more a new understanding of the duality. I am the watcher and the watched. I've been able to take on and look at both perspectives consciously while going through this new learning process. I've understood when and how I'll be able to grasp some of these new concepts as well as when I'm spinning my wheels. At the same time, I am pushing myself to understand this new material to the point that I feel frustrated at times (usually a good indicator for a break).
I'm sure there the reactions to this may range from: "What are you on buddy? And can I have some?" to "Duh! Doesn't everybody do this?" to "You are heading for the looney farm!".
Well, I stopped by the looney farm, and they wouldn't take me. :-) I'm not taking anything so blame it on the air if you want to attribute it to something. As for me, I think this is just an awareness issue rather than a new thing I'm doing. I'm sure my brain has played dual roles many a time, but the be consciously aware of it is something new, at least for me.
What does it all mean? I want be solving cancer, but I do think that it helps me better realize that I am growing into a new understanding. If none of this makes sense, well that's OK -- not sure I completely understand it myself or that I properly expressed it. Still -- like a new trick on a bike or skis or snowboard, it adds to the enjoyment of life.
Whether it is the ultimate excitement or the extremely mundane. All are part of the path, wherever it takes you. The Journey is Life. The Destination is Now.
Monday, December 13, 2004
Sunday, December 12, 2004
We teach people how to treat us
Borrowing one of Dr. Phil's Life Laws, sometimes we have to force the issue.
Life Law #8: We teach people how to treat us.
Strategy: Own, rather than complain about, how people treat you. Learn to renegotiate your relationships to have what you want.
You either teach people to treat you with dignity and respect, or you don't. This means you are partly responsible for the mistreatment that you get at the hands of someone else. You shape others' behavior when you teach them what they can get away with and what they cannot.
If the people in your life treat you in an undesirable way, figure out what you are doing to reinforce, elicit or allow that treatment. Identify the payoffs you may be giving someone in response to any negative behavior. For example, when people are aggressive, bossy or controlling — and then get their way — you have rewarded them for unacceptable behavior.
Because you are accountable, you can declare the relationship "reopened for negotiation" at any time you choose, and for as long as you choose. Even a pattern of relating that is 30 years old can be redefined. Before you reopen the negotiation, you must commit to do so from a position of strength and power, not fear and self-doubt.
Life Law #8: We teach people how to treat us.
Strategy: Own, rather than complain about, how people treat you. Learn to renegotiate your relationships to have what you want.
You either teach people to treat you with dignity and respect, or you don't. This means you are partly responsible for the mistreatment that you get at the hands of someone else. You shape others' behavior when you teach them what they can get away with and what they cannot.
If the people in your life treat you in an undesirable way, figure out what you are doing to reinforce, elicit or allow that treatment. Identify the payoffs you may be giving someone in response to any negative behavior. For example, when people are aggressive, bossy or controlling — and then get their way — you have rewarded them for unacceptable behavior.
Because you are accountable, you can declare the relationship "reopened for negotiation" at any time you choose, and for as long as you choose. Even a pattern of relating that is 30 years old can be redefined. Before you reopen the negotiation, you must commit to do so from a position of strength and power, not fear and self-doubt.
Enter without fear
Having just finished Osho's Courage: The Joy of Living Dangerously, it was time to put it into practice.
Commit as many mistakes as possible, remember only one thing: don't commit the same mistake again. And you will be growing
Fear traps us. Fear of the unknown. It keeps us from growing. To grow we must jump into the unknown, the future. Explore new areas.
And that takes me to The Fall of Advertising and the Rise of PR. This was a book recommended to me. Now I'm not a big fan of Marketing, PR or advertising -- this to jump into this book is definitely new territory.
I blazed through the book, partially because I wanted to use what I might learn as quick as possible but also because I'm not examining my innermost being with each chapter.
I'm definitely heading into new territory here. The book helped me understand why I don't like advertising in general. Makes a lot of sense to me now. It also lets me know that I'm mostly on the right track -- as in not thinking that spending thousands of dollars on advertising would be the way to increase sales.
So what does it all mean? I could answer with a "The hell if I know" response, but I think what it really means is that I need to not just jump into my new business, but dive in, head first. Macworld is coming in January. I think I can have enough things that will give my some public relations coverage on textSOAP. Stepping onto an unknown path, I find something new to use. It reaffirms some things I knew, but introduces new ideas that I might never have had if I didn't wander off. I can usually tell when this happens, as there is a ton of energy flowing through my system (and it's more than can be attributed to the caffeine).
Commit as many mistakes as possible, remember only one thing: don't commit the same mistake again. And you will be growing
Fear traps us. Fear of the unknown. It keeps us from growing. To grow we must jump into the unknown, the future. Explore new areas.
And that takes me to The Fall of Advertising and the Rise of PR. This was a book recommended to me. Now I'm not a big fan of Marketing, PR or advertising -- this to jump into this book is definitely new territory.
I blazed through the book, partially because I wanted to use what I might learn as quick as possible but also because I'm not examining my innermost being with each chapter.
Side note: I find it very interesting that I can zip through certain kinds of books (such as industry books) so quickly, but the pace of reading a deep book or a good novel is much slower. I'll have to give this more thought.
I'm definitely heading into new territory here. The book helped me understand why I don't like advertising in general. Makes a lot of sense to me now. It also lets me know that I'm mostly on the right track -- as in not thinking that spending thousands of dollars on advertising would be the way to increase sales.
So what does it all mean? I could answer with a "The hell if I know" response, but I think what it really means is that I need to not just jump into my new business, but dive in, head first. Macworld is coming in January. I think I can have enough things that will give my some public relations coverage on textSOAP. Stepping onto an unknown path, I find something new to use. It reaffirms some things I knew, but introduces new ideas that I might never have had if I didn't wander off. I can usually tell when this happens, as there is a ton of energy flowing through my system (and it's more than can be attributed to the caffeine).
Thursday, December 09, 2004
Oh Barbarella!
We interrupt this search for enlightenment for a brief Duran Duran promo.
Duran Duran is playing on Tony Danza's show
Friday, Dec 10, 2004.
Duran Duran: Wall to Wall special on VH-1 airs on
Tuesday, December 14, 2004.
Duran Duran is touring across America in 2005. Destinations include Austin, Las Vegas, and Salt Lake City, Portland, San Diego (there are lots more). So apparently no matter where I'm at, they'll be playing.
Click HERE for complete list of shows.
We now return you to your path of enlightenment.
Duran Duran is playing on Tony Danza's show
Friday, Dec 10, 2004.
Duran Duran: Wall to Wall special on VH-1 airs on
Tuesday, December 14, 2004.
Duran Duran is touring across America in 2005. Destinations include Austin, Las Vegas, and Salt Lake City, Portland, San Diego (there are lots more). So apparently no matter where I'm at, they'll be playing.
Click HERE for complete list of shows.
We now return you to your path of enlightenment.
Just Be
Don't say to yourself that you are ugly, wrong, a sinner. Don't condemn. Whatsoever you are, you are. Don't be guilty don't feel guilty. Even if there is something wrong, you are not wrong. Maybe you have acted wrongly, but your being is not wrong because of that. Some action may be wrong, but the being is always right.
-- Osho, Courage: The Joy of Living Dangerously
I came across this today while continuing my read of this very interesting book. I've wondered why Eastern Philosophy seemed to fit so well with my REBT (Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy) training. The above statement is the same the idea of Unconditional Self Acceptance (USA) that is part of REBT. There is you, and then there is your actions and attributes. These are separate entities and while your actions may be bad, the core -- you -- will always be accepted unconditionally.
I find it interesting how multiple paths begin to intersect. Which path to choose? Does it matter? Perhaps all paths will intersect, or perhaps it's just a sign that I am traveling on my path when more and more things intersect.
-- Osho, Courage: The Joy of Living Dangerously
I came across this today while continuing my read of this very interesting book. I've wondered why Eastern Philosophy seemed to fit so well with my REBT (Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy) training. The above statement is the same the idea of Unconditional Self Acceptance (USA) that is part of REBT. There is you, and then there is your actions and attributes. These are separate entities and while your actions may be bad, the core -- you -- will always be accepted unconditionally.
I find it interesting how multiple paths begin to intersect. Which path to choose? Does it matter? Perhaps all paths will intersect, or perhaps it's just a sign that I am traveling on my path when more and more things intersect.
Wednesday, December 01, 2004
Love is a state of being
Love is not a relationship. Love is a state of being; it has nothing to do with anybody else. One is not in love, one is love. And of course when one is love, one is in love--but that is an outcome, a by-product, that is not the source. The source is that one is love.
And who can be love? Certainly, if you are not aware of who you are, you cannot be love. You will be fear. Fear is just the opposite of love. Remember, hate is not the opposite of love, as people think. Hate is love standing upside down, it is not the opposite of love.
The real opposite of love is fear.
In love one expands, in fear one shrinks.
In fear one becomes closed, in love one opens.
In fear one doubts, in love one trusts.
In fear one is left lonely.
In love one disappears; hence there is no question of loneliness at all.
When one is not, how can one be lonely?
-- Osho : "Courage, the Joy of Living Dangerously"
And who can be love? Certainly, if you are not aware of who you are, you cannot be love. You will be fear. Fear is just the opposite of love. Remember, hate is not the opposite of love, as people think. Hate is love standing upside down, it is not the opposite of love.
The real opposite of love is fear.
In love one expands, in fear one shrinks.
In fear one becomes closed, in love one opens.
In fear one doubts, in love one trusts.
In fear one is left lonely.
In love one disappears; hence there is no question of loneliness at all.
When one is not, how can one be lonely?
-- Osho : "Courage, the Joy of Living Dangerously"